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    September 30

    past

    你說
    最可怕的究竟是亙古不變
    還是當你回頭的時候發現自己已非昨日
     

    你長大了
    眼神還是動作,語言還是思想
     
     

    我不敢說自己完完整整得見證了
    可你真的長大了
    或許我是一劑強勁的催化劑
    讓你變成如今的模樣
     
     
    我們都在歲月的聲色中變幻著
    不只是我,還有你
     
     
    我幾乎就要忘記你最初的神采
    卻在這一瞬統統倒轉回記憶的最深處那個柔軟的地方
     
     
    陌生的男孩,甚至難以恢復顴眉
    可他確實存在過
    單純,不算快樂
    帶我走過一小段路
    唱過一些歌
    然後突如其來得消失了
     
     

    然後是大段大段的空白
     
     

    然後是什麽
    是復活的記憶
     
     

    原來始終鮮活在記憶中的你并不是最初最初的那個你
     
     
    所以我本不該站在這裡和你談論記憶中那個最初最初的我
     
     

    我們屬於彼此的是如今這番模樣
    我們只記得彼此在流光中雕刻出的這般滄桑
    或是成長
     
     

    我怎會知道有這麼一天
    回不去的
    記不起的
    被我偷偷發現
     
     
    在那之前
    你有多少夢想?
    我有多少期望?
     
     
    在這之後
    你是否會想和我在一面落地窗下彈琴唱歌曬陽光
    我們是否會有一隻安逸的大狗和一張足夠大的床
     
     

    是時光的作用
    還是我們為彼此改變太多
     
     

    其實我們早已回不去
    那我們就索性不要再想著回去
    不回去了
    我已被你烙上深深的印記
    只是你不曾發現
    沒關係
    就讓我自己看著這印記滲進白骨里
    就讓明日淪為又一個昨日
     
     

    有你就好
    我要你看著我長大
    就像我看著你長大
     
     
     

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